How to handle Disappointment

SAD DOGHave you ever been disappointed?  I think that is an easy question because disappointment is a part of life.  Everyone has been disappointed or disillusioned about a situation.  Usually the disappointment stems from some form of expectation.  Thinking that things are going to be a certain way and when it doesn’t turn out the way that you envisioned, then it’s easy for the disappointment to creep into your mind.  Yes I say creep because disappointment can be a creep! But often time it is self created.

When disappointment creeps in it can cause various reactions. From anger, crying, lashing out or just being a raving lunatic.  Every person deals with it differently depending on their experience and coping skills.  One thing is for sure that it’s part of life and we all have to deal with it.  If one can do it in a positive manner, that would be the best outcome.

The following would probably be healthy ways to deal with it:

  1. Disappointment happens and I’ll say that again, disappointment happens.  It’s not anybody’s fault although somebody could have contributed to it.  But in either case, my dear you must accept this disappointment in order to get on with your life.  It happens to EVERYONE.  You don’t have the market on disappointment.  It’s not punishment for a sin you committed it’s just life.
  2. Call a really good friend and tell them what happened.  You’ll get the support and encouragement you need (hopefully.)  Just make sure you don’t call them only when you have a problem otherwise, they might start to avoid you like the plague.
  3. Journal or write about what happened.  You can either write every bloody detail or simply stick to “nothing but the facts m’am.”  You will have a better understanding of the situation.  Then if you want to burn that paper up when you’re really ready to release it.
  4. Know that depending on the situation you may have to take action.  It could mean distancing yourself from someone, blocking someone on your phone, writing a letter, boycotting an organization etc.  But taking action can be very healing and put you back in the drivers seat.
  5. Consult a professional. Talking to a professional can give you clarity about your choices and options and what you can do.  Just know they won’t tell you what to do but they will get you thinking in the right direction.

Regardless of what actions you take, just know that you are in control of whatever actions you choose to take and it’s your decision.  Make your choices and remember that in most cases, YOU DON’T OWE ANYONE ANYTHING.  So do what’s right for you and get on with your amazing life.

2 thoughts on “How to handle Disappointment

  1. r1ckeas1ey says:

    Well said. Years ago I had to learn how to deal with disappointment (and other negative responses) in order to keep my demons asleep. One technique that worked for me was to state the situation in a historical context. For example; “I remember 5 years ago when I got laid off and was worried about paying my bills.” Doing this reminded me that things are never as bad as they seem at the time, and things always turn out ok eventually. Of course this doesn’t ease the pain you feel at the time, but it DOES give you a healthy proactive method to deal with it. When you hit your thumb with s hammer it still hurts, but if you concentrate on the fact that the pain WILL subside, it does make it easier to deal with. It takes practice, but it works.

  2. ValerieEstrella says:

    Yes I think you’ve been able to deal with it quite well. It’s easier now for me. Nothing beats taking a nap too. Just keep the hammers away from me.

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